My girls are in the living room watching a Christmas Movie, and since I have a few minutes I thought I would get on the computer at a normal hour (not 5:30 a.m.)...... I turned on the television to listen to something, and boy oh boy am I a super lucky girl.........
Barry Manilow:Songs from the Seventies is on PBS. Whooo-Hoooo. My angst about antiques roadshow not being on tonight was forgotten in a heartbeat.........Then I thought, wow I didn't even know this was on. How could I not have caught an advertisement of it...... It's Barry Manilow for Heaven's sake.
Then I remembered. He's not mainstream. Not anymore. And maybe not even when I started to like him. I was about 14. But I kept it a secret. When I was about 18 I got a kitten and named her Mandy. After Barry's song. Still loved him. Still do. I'll listen to him over nickleback any day.
Now there was a big fan base for good 'ol Barry. My parents, their friends, their generation. Not mine.
In 7th grade I learned how to copy the Def Leppard & ac/dc logo's to write all over my 3-ring binder. It's what everyone else did. And we all know how junior high is..........Good thing no one asked me to name a song. I would have had no idea.
Now Barry Manilow or Neil Diamond, Steely Dan, The Eagles, and good old Elvis. I could have sang you a concert. ......and then some.
I wasn't mainstream. But I pretended to be.....
Eventually in 10th grade I had a friend who had the Def Leppard tape, and a walkman, and I learned..... and I broadened my horizons. I came to know & love Motley Crue, and Van Halen, and MC Hammer, and Bobby Brown. But my heart was always with Barry & Neil & Elvis.
After High school it didn't matter anymore...... I could listen who I wanted to listen to & I wasn't judged. In fact I even caught Sammy (after we had been dating for a while) listening to the oldies station that I loved. It helped win my heart over.
Samantha will be entering junior high next year. I breaks my heart to think that she may have to hide some part of herself. Or pretend . Now obviously her choice of music will be (as it was for me) not one of the most vital things. I know this. But it is a start. It is something. However small, it is something. There are bigger and badder choices out here. And they are scarier now. I wish I knew some way to let her know that she is perfect just the way she is.
She has a good head on her shoulders. She stands up for what she believes in. I just pray that she always believes in herself.
And if who she is, and who she becomes is not mainstream, not like everyone else, then that's even better. She shouldn't ever have to pretend.
Whatever path she takes is fine with me, as long as it is her path, and if it's off beaten path, more power to her.